Welcome to Calamity News, where we take every breaking story, inflate the inherent panic, and force-feed you the protein-rich results. Results may vary.
This week you were attacked by Iran, spies, Utah, immigrants, depression, ebola, the CDC, hackers, the President, the TSA, winter, Russia, the Pope, the NFL, and chocolate barons. No, we don’t have to explain what that means. Fine, we covered those breaking stories (and more) this week.
Have a safe weekend!