Tampa, FL – A not so recent survey conducted by Associated Press found that seventy four percent of Americans acknowledged they encountered profanity in public frequently or occasionally and sixty six percent agreed that, as a rule, people curse more today than twenty years ago.

“I swear more because of hard economic times,” said local foul mouth Natalie Winslow. “I usually wake up, drop a few [expletive deleted]s, maybe a [expletive deleted] or an [expletive deleted]hole, then have breakfast. By the time I’m done reading the paper I’ve mixed [expletive deleted] and [expletive deleted] to form [super expletive deleted]. All in a day’s work.”

“Back in my day, we couldn’t say ass,” said an elderly man. “Of course, that was when the [racial epithet]s weren’t allowed to touch anything we touched for fear of catching a [racial epithet] disease. What, I didn’t say ass, did I?”

CURSE, Children Understanding Racy or Sexual Expletives, went on record today saying “we regret nothing!”, “children are going to learn these words no matter what we do. CURSE is a safe and fun way for kids to be introduced into the adult world of swearing” and “[very long string of expletives deleted] you!”

“This is how the Roman Empire fell,” said Roman Empire historian Perry J. Buttmeyer. “Casual swearing eroded their social code which- are you laughing at my name? Seriously? You came all the way over here to interview me and you’re- ok, get out. Get out now or I’ll- stop laughing!”