Washington DC – The Treasury Department announced the Obama administration will not penalize businesses that do not provide health insurance in 2014.
“You know how we really don’t enforce the laws?” asked a White House official. “We kinda gave up on enforcing the border, we’re letting pot slide… so why is this a surprise? Why should we have to enforce the laws that we passed a few years back? That’s crazy.”
“If only they passed something different,” said a Congressman. “Then we could pass a law saying that law should be enforced. But, since no law is in effect making us make up laws, the law isn’t enforceable.” After taking a long sip from his Long Island Iced Tea he added, “I know what you’re going to say and no, I don’t have a clue what I’m talking about. But look how nice this suit fits me!”
The Supreme Court issued a statement calling the announcement “literally the most insane thing we’ve ever heard”, “we’re leaving now, please don’t follow us or attempt to make contact with us” and “just… it’s better if we just end it now, without any more drama. Goodbye.”
“How can the White House, the executive branch, enforce a law?” asked a schoolchild. “Doesn’t Congress pass the laws and the Judicial system rule on their legality? Aren’t laws enforced on the local, state and federal level by the respective law enforcement organizations? So what the [expletive deleted] are they talking about?”