Detroit, MI – Chrysler said it will recall about three hundred fifty thousand vehicles from the 2008 model year because of a condition that may cause the ignition key to get stuck or inadvertently move.
“Yeah, we kinda screwed up,” said an executive. “I mean, in the hectic rush to pump out the exact same car as last year, we included the same exact problems.” He looked out of his office window, adding, “I’ve made so many mistakes. So, so many.”
“That’s our opening!” said a foreign car manufacturer. “Now we can get a foothold into an already overcrowded market!” He did a little dance, adding, “get ready for an affordable mid-sized sedan with great gas milage, world! Get ready!”
The Better Business Bureau called the recall “alarming”, “if companies can just make crappy products and then recall them years later, our endorsement is meaningless!” and “wait, no! We meant, we would be meaningless if… no! Our power is all we have!”
“With the third Gulf War and the threat of new terror, I’m glad I caught this,” said a man standing next to the burned out shell of his car. “So… what do I do now?” After a long pause he added, “screw it, I’m going to Denny’s.”