New Delhi, India – Banking officials admit a spelling mistake in an online bank transfer instruction helped prevent a nearly a billion dollar heist last month involving the Bangladesh central bank and the New York Federal Reserve.
“Most of the time we blindly transfer millions whenever asked,” admitted a banker. “But this time we hesitated, mostly because we hate when people spell things wrong. It just… ugh, right?” He shook his head, adding, “well, I gotta move some money to somewhere for someone. Wish me luck!”
“And we would have gotten away with it to, if it weren’t for those meddling bankers!” said a hacker. “No, it’s from an old cartoon. I don’t remember the name, but they had an American dog and- yeah, they were all American. Anyway, they kept saying they could have gotten away with it and then got mad at someone. No, not the dog, the dog could talk and- yeah! Alvin! That’s it. Here’s a hundred million dollars.”
The Center For Spelling called the mistake “erroneous”, “duplicitous” and “superbolous. Wait, no, we meant to say superfluous. superfluous! This negates nothing! Nothang! Wait, no!”
“Thank god for middle-management sticklers,” said a math nerd. “For they have saved a banks assets and… wait, that’s kinda lame. So a bank saved it’s money because of a mistake, and really, banks not only suck, but are horrible at their one job of keeping your money safe? And, I’m supposed to root for them? Jesus, is… no. Just… no.”