Racism No Longer Tolerated At The Olympics

Athens, Greece – The head of the Greek Olympics team said a female triple jumper was withdrawn from the London Olympic Games today after causing an uproar at home for tweeting what was seen as a racist slur.

“The last time we tollerated racism at the Olympics a world-wide war broke out,” said an Olympic historian. “At the time, we were calling it a WWW, but once the Germans invented the internet in 1941, we changed the war name to WWII and gave the internet the WWW designation.” He took a few puffs from his pipe, adding, “yep, those were simpler times.”

“How is that racist?” asked a top member of Greece’s Golden Dawn party. “She just said she would like to kill all [racial slur omitted] whilst drowning the [racial epithet omitted] and then [violent action omitted]. How is that wrong? We’re for the people!”

Olympic dignitaries called the tweet “confusing”, “how can someone talk to millions of people? Wait, is everyone on the twitter? So millions of people are talking at once?” and “how did we know about this one? Where is the twitter channel? Is it with basic cable? Hello? Can you help? Hello?”

“It’s unfortunate that politics always seeps into the Olympics,” said an American. “For me, it’s a welcome relief to the non-stop political squawking here in the States. That was weird, I have no idea why I just referred to America as ‘the States.’ Guess I am cultured after all. Goooooo USA!”

Report filed by Editor at 12:01 pm