Los Angeles, CA – Federal Aviation Administration is making it easier for local law enforcement agencies to fly unmanned drones.
“Now we can shoot people without getting blood on us,” said a top LAPD official. “Oh yes, we here in administration are especially excited. Do you know how hard it is to get blood out of a five thousand dollar suit?” As he pulled his gun he shouted, “stop resisting! Stop resisting!”
“We’re very excited,” said a drone manufacturer. “Soon robots will control us and we’ll finally be free to enjoy our lives.” He cleared his throat a few times before glancing at his computer, adding, “we’ll be fine, as long as they don’t become self-aware. If that happened, we couldn’t go to the police, we’d have to take matters into our own hands. Okay, great interview.”
Canada called the drones “deeply disturbing”, “we’ve allowed you to do what you want, but this is going too far” and “call back your bots or face annihilation. You have twenty four hours to reply.”
“It’s not as cool as I thought,” said steam punk and community college dropout Aarden McTallen. “I thought they’d be battling futuristic terrorists who have taken the city hostage, but really they’re just harassing us for growing weed on the roof. Not cool, man, not cool.”
